I asked a friend what love is, he told me it's when the thought of him makes you smile. When I met you, I told myself, ' this must be it'...
If you're my baby, I promise I won't hurt you. If you're mine, I promise I'd be loyal to you. But you're only my friend and I can't promise I won't fall for you...
Each time I miss you, a star falls down from the sky. So if you look up and find it dark, it is all your fault. You made me miss you too much...
There's a love that only you can give, a smile that only your lips can show, a twinkle that can only be seen in your eyes and my life that only you can complete...
An angel asked me awhile ago to give him one good reason why I love you so much. I smiled and said, " Because there;s no reason not to"...
50 years from now, I'd be so old I might forget you, I might not remember ever knowing you, or might forget I once cared for you. I might but I won't...
I will never stop loving you, even if you never start to love me. I will never stop being your friend, even if just being friends kills me... At least it's something...
I think part of the reason why we hold on to something so tight for so long is because we fear that something so great won't happen twice...
I may not see you often as I like. i may not hold you all through the night, but deep inside my heart I know that this is true, no matter what I do I will always love you...
I love you so much my heart is sure. As time goes on, I love you more... Your happy smile... Your loving face... No one will ever take your place...
I have liked many but loved very few... yet, no one has been as sweet as you. I'd stand and wait in the worlds longest queue, just for the pleasure of a moment with you...
I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi or even smile at me because I know, even if it's just for a second, that I've crossed your mind...
Hold my hands, I'll close my eyes. Kiss my lips, I'll start to cry. Ask me why? All I will say is you don't know how I've waited for this day...
I cannot speak, I lost my voice. i am speechless and redundant cause I love you' is not enough. I am lost for words...
How can you tell the rain not to fall when clouds exist? How can you tell the leaves not to fall when the wind exist? How can you tell me not to fall in love when you exist?...
Find yourself before you fall in love so you bring with you everything you need to weather all condition and the peaks and troughs that are the process of loving...
Dreaming of you makes my nights worthwhile, just thinking of you makes me smile. Being with you is the best thing ever and loving you is what I'll do forever...
You'll learn to like someone when you find out what makes her laugh but you can truly love someone until you find out what makes her cry...
Would you believe me if I tell you that I love you so much? Actually I'd prefer it if you won't. Why? so that I can spend the rest of my life proving to you how much I do...
When it rains, you don't see the sun, but it's there. hope we can be like that. We don't always see each other but we will always be there for each other...
When the time comes that you'll have to leave me, can you promise to tell me first? So I can take one last look at my one and only possession before it's gone...
So many of us fear tomorrow or regret yesterday. Me? I won't fear tomorrow if I'd get to be with you. And I don't regret yesterday coz one yesterday I met you...
Theory says that life on earth came from a long meteor crash long ago. I don't know about that, but I know life's a whole lot better since you crushed into mine...
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Shattered Dreams...
Last December of 2008, one of my friend came to me and asked for financial help. Her father needs to be operated with his slip disk, she asked me if I want to get a bank loan. At first my plan was to use the loan for my school back fees so that comes June I could enroll and then go back to my studies. But then my friend asked if she could borrow 3/4 of the amount that I'm going to have, since she needs financial help that time badly, I did not hesitate to give the amount that she was trying to borrow. I lent it to her.
First payment for the loan, I asked if I will be the one to pay for it, she told me that she'll do it. Since she promised me that, I hold on to her word, I did not drop any single cent to my check book account. After a month, the bank called me and was advised that I need to pay the amount needed because the bank where I loaned the money, I was disappointed, but then I just asked them to cancel it and I'll just pay the said amount. I called my friend, still she insist that she'll be paying for the monthly loan payment, and same thing as before, I listened to her.
Comes February, worst thing happened, my checking account closed since I'm not depositing any since I was told be my friend that she'll take good care of it, I've got nothing to deposit that particular day coz I already spent my salary. I've decided that no matter what she promise it keeps on being broken, so I just made things clear to myself that I already own the responsilbility of paying the debts that was not even on my plan after all. I see to it that, I'll be saving enough money to pay its monthly charge.
Since I wasn't able to pay on exact month, I had two months delay and right now I've been 4 months delayed due to extra curricular activities that I had at work that has financial involvement. Last month, I took my SSS loan just to have the amount to pay my delayed charges and so that it won't have penalty charges, however, it was already to late, I received a notice letter from the bank stating that I was already penalized and it was 24% of the amount that I have to pay. My heart sunk but I can't think of anything but the just to face this problems.
My dream of going to school this school years 2nd semester shattered into pieces, coz even my "paluwagan" this coming November will go to the bank to pay off the loan. I've been excited and really prepared to go back to school, I even started planning my time management since I won't be resigning with my current job right now coz I love it so much that I can't even try to leave and seek for bigger opportunity. Anyway, bigger opportunity for me is like leaving the country and work abroad. Becoming one of the best Fashion Designer of the country and also the world if ever. Having my own modelling agency which will handle international models and supermodels.
Right now, I just keep my faith that in time I'll have everything solved and paid. All the hard works for this year is the biggest challenge I ever faced for the past years of my life, next to being left by my family when I was still in highschool. I cried of course, but after the tears, I have to smile back and face the problem. I know that no matter what happens, in time, I'll be going back to school and finish my studies, have the degree which will make my appraisal bigger when I seek for another career.
Shattered it may be, but I know that there's something more bigger waiting for me. Somewhere where they will appreciate all my hardworks, my passion and my dedication for every job and responsibilities that's entrusted in me.
"Bargain Heart"
"who wants to buy my heart? i'm having it for sale.. though it's only second hand, scratched and dented, still it functions real well.. i sold it before, they treated it rough and they returned it broken.. they never paid for what they owed.. now, i had it all repaired and i'm back in business again.. i spent the last month fixing it up.. who wants to buy my heart? satisfaction guaranteed.. it has free service charge and a lifetime warranty.. i'll cut you a deal.. if you're asking for the price, well.. you're in a bargain.. it only cost TRUE LOVE :-( " |
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Qoutes from the heart...
Love is a noble act of self giving.
The more you love, the more you lose a part of you.
Yet, you do not become less of who you are.
In fact, you end up being complete.
Life is not a series of meaningless accidents.
When things are bound to happen, they will.
You're not an accident and I was meant to know you.
That's serendipity.
If you're leaving, take me with you.
If you're running away, take me to.
If you're jumping off, hold my hand.
I love life but it's worth losing if I lose it with you.
If you could be a part of my body, I'll let you be my heart.
For I want you to be the one who beats, be the center of my emotions
and be the last one to stop when I'm gone.
If I could reach the rainbow, I'd pull it down and put your name on it,
then put it back in the sky so people would see how colorful my life has been with you in it.
If ever I was given the chance to start my life all over again, I would rather not accept it.
Who knows? In that second start, I may not have known you at all.
I wish I could be with you every night, watch you fall asleep and kiss you goodnight.
When I get to heaven, I know just what to do,
I'll spend eternity watching over you.
Don;t ever get tired of life.
It doesn't matter if you fall several times coz each time you fall,
I won't let you reach the ground.
Trust me, I'll always be around.
You're one of the people I never asked fro God,
But still, He gave you to me.
I asked Him why? He said,
"Because he can fill your life like no one else can"
Please allow me to stare at you.
Please let me prove this love is true.
Please give me a chance to be closer to you.
Please, for I'm falling in love with you.
Whatever you do, I'll walk with you.
Hoping that your dreams come true.
Anytime, anywhere, I'll always be there.
Wishing you love and happiness coz I care.
True love is hard to find,
Special one, one of a kind.
I know it because it appeared to me on a strange day I met you.
You always said you wished you could find the person who loves you,
Then, I walked by and you don't even notice I'm the one who does.
Life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours,
we join up with them in mutual weirdness and call it love.
Wantin' you is easy,
Missin' you is hard,
Constantly I think of you when we are apart.
I've got the padlock you have the key to my heart.
You said you love me and want to hold me tight.
Those words run through my head day and night.
I dreamt you held me and made me see that forever together we would be.
The right guy isn't the one that flirts outrageously with you,
It's the one that stands in the background and catches you when you fall.
Relationships are like snapshots,
Some you remember and some you forget,
but some you never develop and you never get to see how they would have turned up.
People will forget what you said.
People will forget what you did.
but people will never forget haw you made them feel.
It is hard to let go of someone who has touched your life,
but it hurts more to say goodbye to some one when he was never yours yet change your life the most.
I hate the feeling knowing you can't just come up to me and put your arms around me.
I hate it so much because it was the only thing that could brighten up my day.
If I had to choose between you and everything in the world,
I would choose you cause then I'd have more than everything in the world.
The more you love, the more you lose a part of you.
Yet, you do not become less of who you are.
In fact, you end up being complete.
Life is not a series of meaningless accidents.
When things are bound to happen, they will.
You're not an accident and I was meant to know you.
That's serendipity.
If you're leaving, take me with you.
If you're running away, take me to.
If you're jumping off, hold my hand.
I love life but it's worth losing if I lose it with you.
If you could be a part of my body, I'll let you be my heart.
For I want you to be the one who beats, be the center of my emotions
and be the last one to stop when I'm gone.
If I could reach the rainbow, I'd pull it down and put your name on it,
then put it back in the sky so people would see how colorful my life has been with you in it.
If ever I was given the chance to start my life all over again, I would rather not accept it.
Who knows? In that second start, I may not have known you at all.
I wish I could be with you every night, watch you fall asleep and kiss you goodnight.
When I get to heaven, I know just what to do,
I'll spend eternity watching over you.
Don;t ever get tired of life.
It doesn't matter if you fall several times coz each time you fall,
I won't let you reach the ground.
Trust me, I'll always be around.
You're one of the people I never asked fro God,
But still, He gave you to me.
I asked Him why? He said,
"Because he can fill your life like no one else can"
Please allow me to stare at you.
Please let me prove this love is true.
Please give me a chance to be closer to you.
Please, for I'm falling in love with you.
Whatever you do, I'll walk with you.
Hoping that your dreams come true.
Anytime, anywhere, I'll always be there.
Wishing you love and happiness coz I care.
True love is hard to find,
Special one, one of a kind.
I know it because it appeared to me on a strange day I met you.
You always said you wished you could find the person who loves you,
Then, I walked by and you don't even notice I'm the one who does.
Life is a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours,
we join up with them in mutual weirdness and call it love.
Wantin' you is easy,
Missin' you is hard,
Constantly I think of you when we are apart.
I've got the padlock you have the key to my heart.
You said you love me and want to hold me tight.
Those words run through my head day and night.
I dreamt you held me and made me see that forever together we would be.
The right guy isn't the one that flirts outrageously with you,
It's the one that stands in the background and catches you when you fall.
Relationships are like snapshots,
Some you remember and some you forget,
but some you never develop and you never get to see how they would have turned up.
People will forget what you said.
People will forget what you did.
but people will never forget haw you made them feel.
It is hard to let go of someone who has touched your life,
but it hurts more to say goodbye to some one when he was never yours yet change your life the most.
I hate the feeling knowing you can't just come up to me and put your arms around me.
I hate it so much because it was the only thing that could brighten up my day.
If I had to choose between you and everything in the world,
I would choose you cause then I'd have more than everything in the world.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Me, Myself and I
My real name is Jonathan Olaer Gapul. Born on February 23, 1986 under the sign of Pisces and a true blood Tiger. I am much closer with my Mom, though my Dad happens to be a stage father when I was still young, pushing me to join all the the events we have in school, from school plays to being sporty. My dad is a true blood "probinsyano" who happens to live like a bachelor at the age of 50+ (can you believe that?), he happens to have a "barkada" almost as my age, older than me of course. I am the eldest of four, some says I don't look like them unless you double check our features, some says, I'm more of my father's especially now that i'm already grown up. I even experienced being called by my Dad's name when I was buying something at the store near where I live.
I live with my friends family for five years now, considered as one of their family member. One thing that I've proven with my father's relative; someone will adopt me and care for me as one of their family member. I've been independent since the age of 13 since my family left me and stayed in my fathers province in Samar. I started working at the age of seventeen after I graduated from high school.
I live with my friends family for five years now, considered as one of their family member. One thing that I've proven with my father's relative; someone will adopt me and care for me as one of their family member. I've been independent since the age of 13 since my family left me and stayed in my fathers province in Samar. I started working at the age of seventeen after I graduated from high school.
I've been into several fast food chains, Jollibee and Chowking to be particular, been into theatre as an actor and Stage Manager. Had the chance to work as an event coordinator and also been a Jr. Cook with one of the newly built restobar in the City. Haven't got the opportunity to finish my degree in HRM. Undergone call center training when I decided to try something new. Had the chance to work in Makati for 4 consecutive months, then back in Pampanga.
Been hired as an associate at Sutherland Global Services, been with the company for quite awhile now. enjoying my job and got the chance to go to US for Mortgage Training, one of the biggest opportunity that was given by the company. My dream is to become one of the top fashion designers around the Globe, well known and have my own modelling agency that handle potential models and actors.
I'm not a family person and I've never been into relationship for quite a long time. So currently am still single and looking for someone who will make me feel special. Motto in life; time is Gold; I'll rather be better than best coz there's always someone out there who's best than I am. "Fata Viam Inveniente". That's all for now...
Monday, July 13, 2009
Philosophies and Music in Life: from Soultaker's profile
"I'm trapped in this world Lonely and fading, Heart broke and waiting For you to come. We are stuck in this world that’s not meant for me, for me."
"Why is everything so fucking hard for me? Keep me down to what you think I should
"sadness is a gift if felt with honesty..."
"I'm screaming for something -- Knowing nothing is better than knowing it all"
"uninspired and growing tired why am i so attracted to drama so here i am, grown up at 23 will someone tell me what it takes to be happy"
"the broken watch you gave me turns into a compass, its two hands point to the same time -- 12:03, our last goodbye"
"If you could slit my throat, with my last one grasping breath, i'd apologived for bleeding at your shirt"
"Why is everything so fucking hard for me? Keep me down to what you think I should
"sadness is a gift if felt with honesty..."
"I'm screaming for something -- Knowing nothing is better than knowing it all"
"uninspired and growing tired why am i so attracted to drama so here i am, grown up at 23 will someone tell me what it takes to be happy"
"the broken watch you gave me turns into a compass, its two hands point to the same time -- 12:03, our last goodbye"
"If you could slit my throat, with my last one grasping breath, i'd apologived for bleeding at your shirt"
ONE LOVE by soultaker
Barriers are made to be broken/
And love is a destiny to unfold/
But what if the journey to forevers/
Laden with hindrance, we started to let go/
You’re the one who inspired me/
Show me how life is beautiful/
But yet everything feels so empty/
You’re too far, too perverse to reach on/
Even God would not honor this/
It is sinful to fall in love with you/
If only people would realize and understand/
My love for you is more than my life/
I love you but than we have no choice/
Only in our dreams our love will flow/
More than star-crossed sweethearts/
Our situation is left in the dark/
Let the memories last forever/
And all the heartaches vanishes to the sea/
As the wind blows and time runs faster/
Let the rainfall fades our everything
Our eyes will faithfully be the same/
The looks will always last forever/
Somehow, I know, as I will always be/
Hope will see us through, love will set us free/
And love is a destiny to unfold/
But what if the journey to forevers/
Laden with hindrance, we started to let go/
You’re the one who inspired me/
Show me how life is beautiful/
But yet everything feels so empty/
You’re too far, too perverse to reach on/
Even God would not honor this/
It is sinful to fall in love with you/
If only people would realize and understand/
My love for you is more than my life/
I love you but than we have no choice/
Only in our dreams our love will flow/
More than star-crossed sweethearts/
Our situation is left in the dark/
Let the memories last forever/
And all the heartaches vanishes to the sea/
As the wind blows and time runs faster/
Let the rainfall fades our everything
Our eyes will faithfully be the same/
The looks will always last forever/
Somehow, I know, as I will always be/
Hope will see us through, love will set us free/
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