Farewell 2012, Hello 2013

Hey 2012,

My first half was not that good, you welcomed me with no stable career for 5 mos, made me discover what I really want to be and let me embrace the passion that was kept within me for a long time. Though I am thankful coz you blessed me with new job and new people to get along with. We had a lot of tough times together, not just me but the whole nation that I'm with, a lot of tragic and memorable moments... I still thank you coz you ended it with a blast.

Hey 2013,

Welcome me with abundant blessing and great expectation. Motivation, Drive and Passion is what I'll be asking for. I won't have any resolutions yet, I'll just make sure that I will learn from what happened in the past, try to avoid doing it in the present and make sure to keep it for the future. May God Bless us all... :)

Happy Halloween...

This story happened way back my college days. I joined one of the school organizations that we have to open new possibilities and as well as to enhance my leadership potential. To become part of the group we need to attend the initiation exercises along with the new members. This experience is the most creepiest experience I ever had. I am a person with a "gift" as what they say and I can sense other elements who lives with us and can as well see what happens when I feel uneasy and uncomfortable even though I am not on the same place where things happen specially when it's with someone I'm in contact with or I care about.

The story starts... We had our initiation done within Clark Grounds, Picnic ground, and centennial park doing  a lot of fun activities that challenged us new members physically, mentally and emotionally. The last part of the initiation was within the abandoned hospital where in a lot of ghost stories have been told and some of us never believe in. We need to find a sign that was painted on one of the pillars within the hospital similar to the one that our leaders took photo of. At first everyone is very excited since we're doing it dawn time and sun is almost down so it will be totally dark and we only have flash lights with us. Excitement since it's our last challenge to fulfill and as well as to experience it ghost stories were actually true when we go inside the hospital. As I went out from the van, I felt uneasy and felt cold, didn't know why and I didn't bother to think about it, just thought that maybe it's because there's a lot of trees around and I'm just a bit scared. As we are about to enter the hospital, I sensed that there was something, a barrier, that doesn't allow me to go inside. I tried again and yet it was still the same, I was the only one left and my team mates were already inside. After few minutes I tried to enter again and I was successful enough however, cold air just started to pass through me and I felt more and more uneasy. I can sense that I am not welcome inside that hospital and there's something that is going to happen. Still  ignored, I still want to succeed with the challenge that was given to us and so I moved forward to look for my team. I started to hear children crying and some shouting and it made my hair all over stand. I thought that it was only me, and I realized that few of us did hear what I'm hearing. We did found what we are looking for and after that we all panicked and started running out of the building.

Police officers were there when we came out and they even scolded us cause no one was allowed to enter the building since there was an accident that happened a week before that cause death to one of the kids who played around the hospital. We were all shocked for a moment, we prayed before we left just to make sure that we did disturbed those spirits who lives in the building and we'll all be leaving peacefully as we thought. I felt tired and slept in the van... I dreamed of what happened with the kid who died in the building, he was asking for help from his friend, he was in agony and he's asking to be saved from falling within the ruined floor of the building and yet no one helped him out, he fell on the basement of the building that cause his death. I was crying and asking for help, my friends wake me up. They said that I was having a nightmare and I was calling names that they didn't recognize. I felt heavy after that. I thought it was just a dream, later that I realized that the spirit of the kid who died came along with me. He was with until I reached home and whenever I close my eyes I always see what happened to him and it was scary. I lighted a candle inside my bedroom and prayed, asking for him to leave in peace and as  much as I would like to help him out I can't do anything.  I was so scared that he might not let go, thankfully he listened. Though what I envisioned in my dream remained there, detailed. And whenever I remember this, I still feel the same, cold and uneasy.

I L Y...

Can't help myself of thinking that one day, we can love each other more that what we have right now. I know that you considered me as your sibling but for me it's more than that and I know that you know how my heart truly feels about you. The main reason why I can't just leave you, not help you out and even to not care about you is simply because I've been in love with you.

I feel jealous not knowing what's on your past, hearing something bad about you is not acceptable on my end and no matter what other people says... in my HEART... ILY

A new place to start over again...

April 28, 2012, it's official that we really need to leave the place where we stayed for 6 years. Leaving some friends that we used to stick with and new friends that we just knew recently. Sad, yet we still need to move on. We all grew with the saying that "change is always constant in this world, nothing is permanent". 


I feel sad that I really need to transfer to another place where in I don't know anyone around and the location is far larger than what I'm used to. It made me realized that I need to move on and find a new path where in I really have to stand on my own two feet, without the people whose been with me for awhile and just see them once in awhile. I really want to move up, step up and grow in an environment that suite me well. A career that will reflect my true personality. 


Really need to make a good decision about all these stuff that is running through my mind.

Holy Week Koreanovela Craze

As the Holy Week starts, I am becoming more bored of not doing anything, I know that this will be the best time to repent for all the sins that I have done and I feel that I am still doing, yet I couldn't the best way to do it.

Monday, I started the week paying all the bills that we need to pay at home, it's been nice to walk around even though the weather is too hot and I can't really breathe under the heat of the sun.

Tuesday, I went home after awhile to see my mom and as well as my lovely niece. It's been nice seeing faces that you haven't seen for quite sometime already. I can't say that I didn't miss them coz I totally do, it's just that I was brought up to be tough and strong. Living independently for quite sometime now is really great, it boost my personality more and more and I've been discovering a lot for the people that I see around.

Wednesday, I started watching the Season 1 of Dream High, which I did enjoyed a lot even thought the guys here at home are mad at me since loading of the videos cause interruption with their DOTA game. It's fun though, I love seeing them being irate at me once in awhile since I was the only one being blamed whenever they are having net interruption even while I'm just in the living room watching movies.

Dream High having 2 seasons which will be aired soon here in the Philippines under ABS-CBN, at first is just out of curiosity that is why I started watching over the net. I love it actually, even though it's hard to watch while reading all the subtitles, and following the lines that each character is saying. What the heck, I really don;t understand myself why I could easily get caught with all this craze, maybe because this people do really have good taste when it comes to producing films as well as TV Series. I know that I should be proud of our own makings however, being in honest opinion, I became tired of watching almost the same stories that is being produce here in the Philippines, it's almost the same, good VS evil, drama, romance and politics.

Watching Dream high made me realized a lot of things, specially that I can relate to the characters that was on the series, striving hard to achieve their goals of becoming a STAR and finding another passion where they can grow up and excel more. Just like mine, I have dreamt of becoming a Fashion Model however there are certain criterias where in I wouldn't pass, this must not stop me, instead I can find another way to be in the Fashion Industry and right now the only way for that is to let go of all the reasons and hindrances why I still am not pursuing such lovely dream. I'm not getting any younger anymore, I only have 24 more years to have my dream come true and I am hoping for the best. Dream High, Boys Over Flower, Coffee Prince, and a lot more korean craze that I've became hooked with, my only hope is that I can have the chance to meet each of it's cast and even learning the korean way of life, language, fashion and showbiz...

How will I end my holy week, I am not sure, but one thing is certain. This week made me realize a lot of things that needs to be done for me to grow up and fulfill my dreams. It's not yet late to have everything fixed and I can't just stay around where I'm comfortable living with. I need to roam around and find my rightful place just like what my other friends did. Will I start saving up and become a little thrifty? the answer is not certain we'll just need to wait if I could start doing what I know is right and yet I couldn't start to follow.

On 23rd turned 26

Silent...

Solemn...

Peaceful...

Three simple words to describe my 26th year of existence in this world. Thankful that God gave me another chapter to fill and another year to discover and gain more knowledge and wisdom. Another 12 months to discover new things about the beauty of His creation. Another 366 days of facing challenges and surpassing each every passing days.

It's not always about the party and celebration, but what's more important is the thought that people whom you have loved and cared for can still remember that one special day when God has created someone special to be part of their lives. I've been thankful every year simply because this one special day can make me realize who are these true people who are always there whenever you are troubled and are there to support you all through out when you're down and needs someone to lean on.

I look back on the old days when I am just a nobody, and I am so happy that I was taught by my family to always look back to where I started because it's helping me in becoming a better person. Today, I just want to look back on those good old days and as well as the days when I had fallen apart. I look forward to better tomorrow and I believe that one day, I will be having the dream that I have always dreamed of. I still believe that "Fate always finds its way", I just need to have patience in waiting.

In this special day of mine, I would just like to thank those who's been there always beside me and keeping the fire inside me alive. In time I will be able to thank you all. I could say that I'm a bit disappointed because this isn't my plan, however I still feel happy and contented. To you all, I don't need to mention your names because I know that you already knew who you all are, from the bottom of my heart thank you so much for making my day so special.

Just a little thought...

Tonight, after watching Sex and the City 2, I came to realize that it has been 4 years since I went to US. It made me miss a lot of happy memories when I got the chance to stay in NJ for 3 months and visit some states in the East particularly New York since most of our weekend we go there and roam around.

I miss a lot of things whenever I see photos of the buildings that I have seen and of course the urge of going back to the US, might it be to study, work or live for awhile. I envy some of my friends who have relatives that supports them entirely and will even sponsor them to go abroad. I wish I have some too. However, live has never been fair, in life we have different fate, different destiny. I guess I am destined to work hard before I can earn what I wish to earn and I need to face all the challenges in life. 

I wish things were different, if only wishes do come true and what I think about do come true then I can definitely have everything that I want to have. They say that magic is just for kids and kids at heart and yet it makes me wonder if it's really true cause I really want to have one so that I can make a lot of difference not just with my life as well as with the lives of those who are in need. I guess if I was born with golden spoon in mouth, I wouldn't have the same attitude that I have right now. I might be someone who is high and mighty. A so called bitch and a bully, someone who looks down on other people and criticize them. Or, I can be someone who helps other people a lot specially those who are in need. 

We will never know, but one thing is certain. I want to have a name of my own, a palace if not a mansion dedicated to my mom. An abode for my adopted family who's always been there to support me and accept for everything that I am. On February 23rd, it'll be my 26th birthday and I need to step up and straighten my life. I need to make sure that I will go back to school and have a degree in college no matter what. Find someone who will be my guide and who will be there to back me up and insure that I will be living my dream. Age does not matter, what matters most is that I have the skills and talent that can help me out in conquering everything.

Tonight I will sleep with all this dream not just in my head but as well as inside my heart. I pray to God that He may light up the path on where my journey begins. But, before this things can happen, I need to have a good start...

I am a Sutherlander

I still remember the good old days when I first came in to Sutherland, I'm scared and not confident enough that I can pass the interviews that I'll be going through. It was the 3rd quarter of 2007 and if I remember everything correctly; I actually failed during my language interview and did not get the opportunity to undergo final interview. After a month, someone called me from the recruitment team and asked me if I am willing to undergo 4 weeks language training, I'm part of the first batch. It's the first time that they will be having this 4 weeks COL training for those whom they think just need some more time in learning the proper way of speaking the universal language. I did not let the opportunity pass and grab it right away. On our 3rd week, one account, my very first account, had hiring for new agents;

Blockbuster;

I had fun writing an essay as part of the process in checking if I will pass and be part of the account and I did. I became an official part of Sutherland September 17, 2007. Blockbuster was a fun, easy and cool account, it's basically email. You need to answer costumer's query through email and the most difficult metrics that you need to achieve is CSAT since it's not easy to please and satisfy someone when you're not actually speaking to them and explaining the reasons on why there are some problem that occurred in their services. The sad part, we are the accounts wave 8 and we only stayed for a month, 2 weeks of product training and 2 weeks being on the floor and we were all transferred to another account. My Home...

PHH;
My comfort zone. The place where we treat each other as one team and one family, together we strive for the growth of the account. This is the place where I learned to believe in myself and strive to grow up. The account that opened a lot of opportunities on my end and for my team mates as well. PHH gave me the opportunity to see the "Dream Land"; I was sent to US for mortgage training and I really enjoyed the tours that we had while staying there for 3 to almost 4 months. I was able to visit New York, Niagara Falls, Staten Island where Statue of Liberty is located, Philadelphia, and Atlantic City. I've been part of this account for almost 3 years and tears fell when I had to leave it and start a new.

JPMC;
I did had a bad start with the account, most especially with the tenured guys who has been part of the account since it all started. We were unwelcome, that's what I did feel when we came in the first time and I knew right there and then that we need to step up and make a difference so that everyone will accept and appreciate us. As we move forward, things changed and we became one tough family to beat. When you say Barangay Chase it only means one thing unity, one team and a family, everyone can't let us down until such time that everything came to and end wherein we need to bid farewell to others and just see you around for some.

Do I still need to mention the last which happens to be a hell??? No need to I guess, though I did met a lot of great people and gained new friends my last account was the worst. It's gave me the realization that as much as I have love being a Sutherlander, there are some things that you need to give up and start looking for a new home. But of course in my heart Sutherland will always be no.1. My home outside my real home, I'll be back when everything is on track. Signed off effective January 04, 2012.

Why do you want to study fashion?

Aside from the fact that I would love to be a world renowned filipino fashion designer, I want to study fashion to learn the from the basic up until I further develop my talent and skills in creating the best clothing designs that is not only fashionable as well as comfortable and wearable.


The best people that we have in our country did not just rely simply on their skills and talents as well as creativity. They enhance their skills and talents by continuous study and learning and as well as experience of course. I can say that I could create what I envisioned, and yet the question is, did I execute it very well? One thing is certain, we all need proper education in whatever career or profession we choose. I believe that practice makes perfect but then again having the opportunity to study and get proper education on what you would love to do is still the best solution for me to be able to gain the knowledge that will be essential when I start moving around the industry that I would love to take part of.


Fashion is something very magical for me, it is my way of portraying the characters on fairy tale books when I was still a little child. My way of relieving stress when I started studying and as well as when I already need to work to sustain a leaving and support my love ones. I often sketch designs that just pops out of my creative mind and as well as getting ideas from what I see from the magazines and fashion shows that I have watched. It's not a mere fanatic but happened to be a dream, that one day I could see myself having my own clothing line, working with celebrities, fashion icons; etc and having fashion shows not just here in the Philippines but as well as top fashion cities in the world. 


For me, studying fashion will be essential. It will give me the proper knowledge that is needed aside from the skills and talent that I already possess. It will also be an enhancement on my end since I grew up in the saying that proper education is the only possession that you can have and can never be stolen.