Chaos...

Xbox being pulled out just recently then comes Mc Afee being totally transferred having hundreds of employees being redeployed.

Obama's new bill having outsourcing companies going back to US since most Americans lost their jobs and he wants them to be stable once again. Recession is still at its peak, I guess.

People around were uneasy, unable to think what's going to happen next. Unable to think positively since everything around happens so fast.

What's going to happen next? Most of the Asian countries rely with outsourcing. If major companies from the US will pull out, are we still stable enough to stand and believe that we're all going to make it through? or we have to sacrifice ourselves again by working abroad as OFW's?

Is my job right now still stable? Will I be with the same account until next year before I decide to go back to school? Will my work stats help me be retained where am at right now? or I will also be one of those guys who will be finding another job to support themselves?

Chaos... this is something that needs to be think of twice, thrice and many times.

Happy Birthday and Farewell my friend...

It's been more than a year since we've been together. I missed those days when we go out together, party together and drink together.

We've been in the same house for almost 6 months before I had a new family who adopted and loved me. Long time before we got the chance to meet again, the very recent one was February of last year, during one of our friends school competition. I was hoping that you'll be the one to make me beautiful when I represent my account for Carnival Queen at Sutherland and yet you left too soon. I felt so sad and yet I can't do anything. I longed to see you and yet I didn't get the chance to see you for the last time since my heart can't accept the truth that you're already gone.

I know that you're happy where you at right now. Happy Birthday Kuya Mon and Farewell...

Which is which?

After a long time of not writing anything here, undecided what topic to discuss. I've been busy for quite sometime since February. Already been into a lot of trials on what topics to post.

I had the saddest birthday ever... I lost the most valuable piece of my life... I had the most unforgettable embarrassing moments of my entire life after sleeping on my vomit during our theatre directors birthday few years back and now being a total ground zero at one of the hottest spot in the Metro...

Still don't have my special someone... In search for love... Been hooked with Facebook and Asia novelas once again my most recent one was You're so Beautiful and Yamato Nadeshiko Sechi Hengi...

Got the chance to train new hire for our account, and been promoted as one of the SME's/Senior Agent... Faced all the challenges and trials almost everyday, testing my patience and mind focus.

What else? am not yet sure...

This is me...

" all I want to find is someone who could accept me..."

" My name is Gaps, I may not be discreet but I know how to present my self very well, I am prim and proper, I have the right attitude towards everything... Some says that I'm a chameleon who can always adopt certain changes with my environment"

I love hanging out with friends, traveling, party and photography. I love capturing the beauty of everything that surrounds me. I love meeting people and making friends with them. Intimidating at times, coz people always have an impression that I'm a snob, but hell am not. I maybe talkative but I also know how to listen. I'm a career person, I focus more on my growth and for the growth of those whom I care a lot.

I pity those who pretend to be some one whom they are not, being true to yourself is way much better rather than becoming a pathetic fool, if you're gay, then embrace it, accept the fact that bisexual are for those who can have sex and relationship with both male and female, if you only love guys then don't be a fool...

I may wear heels at work, have nail polished every 15th and 30th of the month, have long hair, and plucked eyebrows...

But one thing am certain, I'm willing to change if someone gives me that so called respect and love...

--can I be your right one?


I am GAY and happy to be out and proud...

Collections...

"I told you that I loved you and my heart stopped not because I was saying it for the first time but because I knew I meant it more than anything."

"And this is love: two souls that freely meet, and have no need of proving anything."

" I wanna be the girl who makes your bad days better the one that makes you say, "my life has changed since I met her"

"A part of you has grown in me, together forever we shall, never apart, maybe in distance but in the heart."

"I wonder how many people never get the one they want, but end up with the one they're supposed to have"

"Caring for someone is easy but making someone care for you is hard. Now I kept wondering... How did you make it easy for me to care for you."

"If you love someone you say it, you say it right then, out loud. Otherwise the moment just... passes you by..."

"People think that if you love somebody hard enough then everything is just gonna work out. People are wrong."

"I don't know if we each have a destiny or if we're all just floatin' around accidental-like on a breeze. But I, I think maybe it's both."

"You made me realize that I've always been missing something I never even knew I wanted."

"I never wanted the stars, never shot for the moon. I like them right where they are? all I wanted was you."

"Maybe some friendships aren't meant to saved. Maybe we're meant to spend certain part of our life with certain people... and then move on."

"I told him I was afraid of falling, and he whispered, "I have wings."

"Couples who love each other tell each other a thousand things without talking."

"I believe in memories, they look so, so pretty when I sleep. And when I wake up, you look so pretty sleeping next to me."

"Oh I just remembered how your hand fits the curve of my waist, and how your smile fits the curve of my mind."

"Why do we close our eyes when we kiss, when we dream, when we sleep? because the best things in the world go unseen..."

"Sometimes, it feels no one understand I don't even know why, I do the things I do CAUSE ITS A LONG LONG JOURNEY TILL I FIND MY WAT HOME TO YOU"

"I never want you to think that you are anything less than amazing."

"Never give up on the things that make you smile."

"There's a millions of people in this world, but in the end it all comes down to one."

"I can make no apologies for following my heart."

"I will put a wall around my heart and would not let anyone in. You know why? It's because my heart will wait forever just to be with you again"

"I loved you without knowing how. I loved you without knowing when. I loved you without knowing why. I love you even though knowing to you, I'm just a friend..."

"I have to many people for more than a billion times but when I first saw you, my heart took over and smiled for the first time."

Year 2010

Start of another year, another chapter has been open on this book called "LIFE". What do we expect for this year? What are the new challenges that we'll face not only to ourselves but also for the whole country?

This year will be another start for our country, 2010 election will be taking place this May and we need to decide who's going to be the best and suitable leader whom we should be voting. A leader who can make our country progress more in it's economic status. A leader who is honest, trustworthy and responsible enough to face all the problems that our country is still facing right now. I could say that Madame GMA made a big impact when it comes to our economic problem, she provided more jobs for us Filipinos. BPO's were born because of her, high school graduates and college undergraduates got the chance to work on their careers with call center jobs. She did a lot of things for our country that we should have noticed and appreciated, but then again people only see her flaws, the wrong things.

I should say that Filipino mentality is the main cause as to why our country couldn't achieve it's growth. We have our own choices on whom we want to be our leader but when we see something wrong and hear some bad rumors about them, we are the first one to react and do something that cause more trouble. Ans what I hate the most, paying peoples to join rallies which doesn't have any relevance.

Why can't we just be happy for what we have right now? Why can't we support those who leads us, react when we see that everything gone wrong and our leader couldn't even do anything anymore but just stealing our earned hard works. I can find those who lead this stuff as someone who doesn't know how to follow the laws of nature. Who wants to break the law and be the one seated on the position that isn't really meant for them. I'm not pertaining any particular here, I'm merely expressing base on what I have observed.

This year, 2010, we need to be sure who's going to be the right person to lead our country. We need someone who is a good listener, has a good eyesight and a heart that is gold, a listener to our country's cry, an eyesight to see the sadness in his country's eyes and a golden heart that can heal our country's wound that swells from all the difficulties of the past. Let's make sure that we are doing the right choice, not because of the campaign materials they use and not because of the promises they keep on saying that never happens. We need to check on their backgrounds, if they did well before they run as presidential nominee.

All I'm saying is that, let's make this new year a whole new one. A year of growth, for ourselves, for our family and relatives, for our country men and most of all for our country. Also, let us heal our country, let it not swell more and have all hard works gone to nothing.

A prosperous, productive and full of love new year to all.

A story to tell...

Let me share this story about my childhood friends family whom I consider to be my second family when I was still young, way back when we are still in our primary years and half of my secondary years. Before I moved out of the subdivision where I dreamed of many thing and planned my career.

I won't be disclosing their personal information. Though, I know that if someone knows me well reads this particular story they would recognize who's that childhood friend of mine is. I dedicate this story to them since I always remember their family the most during Christmas time, where i envy them so much even though my family is also doing great during this holiday season.

So here it goes...

!5 years ago, when I was still leaving in this small subdivision, I had this childhood friends who became so close to me and my family, they were like my sisters. At first they are not living inside the subdivision, they had their house just outside the subdivisions gate and they were my sister's classmate in Kindergarten and eventually as time passed by they also became my friends. My father who is a total friendly neighbor became friends with their mom and everyone outside the subdivision, since my father used to sell fishballs during night time roaming around the barangays near our place. I'm also having my haircut with one of their borders.

After a few years, they transferred inside the subdivision because their mom became the care taker of this apartment blocks near our home, actually in front of our house. This twins became more closer to us. We along with my siblings and some friends from the blocks used to play outside after school until 7pm, and since back then, we don't have our own TV set, we tend to go to their place just to watch movies and of course some of our favorite television shows.

We used to have a house party at their place with friends, watching movies, playing playstation games and of course sleep overs which happens almost everyday especially when our parents allowed all of us to sleep at their place. I even had my mother locked me out of the house since I went home very late. Simply because, I still don't want to go home since I love what i'm watching. I'm one of the eldest on our group that time and my friends mom always asks me to watch over them especially when she needs to leave at night, with extra "Baon", money of course coming from here, she's like a mom to me.

During Christmas, I envy them so much cause they always get what they want. New clothes, toys, games, money and etc, since their father has a good job in Manila. Their house has the best Christmas decoration cause their mom's very creative, have the best foods also. They are the happiest family I ever saw and admired, up until now of course, I wish I could go back and be with them again.

They picture the perfect family, hardworking and loving dad, caring, thoughtful and loving mom, and children who knows how to appreciate everything that is given to them, may it be big or small. One small yet happy family. Their parents even love taking good care of us, their friends. Their family is like friendship also, they have bonding moments whenever their dad goes home from manila.

But something happened that became a shock to all of us. We all knew at an early age that their mom was into drugs that time, along with one of our childhood friend's mom and some who also live on our neighborhood. Their mom was sent to rehab due to drugs, for six months. Their house became dull, so silent and so sad, my friends were not brought up us spoiled ones but responsible ones. They know how to work all by themselves at an early age and that's already something. Nobody knew what was happening from the inside, everything seems the same even though Tita was not around.

After six months, Tita was already cleared off and was sent back home, we thought that everything was still the same. She even tells us her story when she was still inside, she's perfectly better. Their family had to keep up with the missing days with their mom and so things were back to it's form. My parents had no news regarding this stuff coz I was already by myself that time. My family already left to my father's province for good. I was alone by myself and they where my family for a year and a half before my Aunts pulled me out of the house cause it was already been sold.

Shocked came to me when I heard the news one time I visited them advising that my friends mom and dad broke up. They already had a problem since they had their mom back from rehab. Their father had an affair when he was still in manila and so their mom had to leave and go back to her province. Shattered as it may be, but my friends kept on being strong as they are. They had to move out of their apartment and live with their Grandma, whom I actually don't like that much, may her soul be at peace.

Last time I was with them was in Zambales, they were staying at their mother's friend's house and then went back to Pampanga. But then again, the other half stayed with their mom in Laguna, from which I heard that they are happy coz their mom already moved forward with her life and has a boyfriend.

Right now, I don't have any news from them, I heard that the other one is having a baby and no news with the other half. I'm just hoping that both of them will be in good condition. I miss the Family that I admire so much, but what can with do, fate keeps on changing what we intend to keep.