I'm committed to date, been 9 months, couldn't say that it's perfect since we don't have perfect communication with each other. Do I still love him? that I can't answer straight coz my heart is beating for someone else right now. A person whom I know I can help in building his dreams, I feel so sad that I have to feel this way, maybe I just grew tired of asking for him to grow up and be responsible and found someone who captures my interest when it comes to being responsible and has a dream, a goal to achieve in life.
Yes, I'm honest and true that I'm not faithful coz I still go out with different guys all the time, but that doesn't mean that I didn't love him. I already gave everything that I've got and being with him is the biggest challenge I ever had. He's not my lucky charm I guess, coz whenever he's near trouble is on its way. Being so perky and kind is becoming quite difficult, I can't say "NO" or should I say that I don't know how to say "NO".
The dilemma of meeting someone new and that someone captures your heart is quite frustrating. I should have stop myself from the very start if I only knew that things will be this way. I know that I need to be contented with whom I'm committed with right now, but I can't stop myself from caring two special person at the same time. I always say to myself that I need to focus with one priority at a time but since I am confident that I can handle things very well, might as well go on.
When the time comes and it will cause me pain, then that I guess would be the time for me to stop and start a new.
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